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How can parents create a supportive home environment for stressed children?

Two students reading a book on the table with a stressed face

Even though the world is on the development and industrialization path, everybody in this world lives under the burden of emotional stress, pressure at work, and other things. This is not the case just with adults; our children too are suffering from stress and pressure. Hence, a great understanding capacity is required to understand the emotional state of your children. It requires good parenting skills for cultivating a suitable environment which is free from stress and supportive of the children. Many parents indulge in a debate of questions like:

  • How to find out if your child is going through a state of pressure and stress?
  • What is the solution to get the stress out of our child’s mind?

They do not have the emotional intelligence to figure out what is going on with them. They will require a lot more time to comprehend what is going on in their mind or their surroundings. They only feel weird or out of sorts as they are expressing their emotions. Hence, there is a need to comprehend the sign of stress in children and help them deal with overcoming it. The most effective remedy at this stage for the parents is to listen to them. Attempt to detect their emotional and behavioral signs.

Signs indicating stress in children 

1) Emotional hints

  • Mood swings without any reason: If the child shows inappropriate mood swings like anger, frustration, and aggression without a reason, such may indicate stress or pressure. These can lead to him or her damaging his or her mental health if his mind becomes too restless, or fear or sadness comes into his or her mind for an unsophisticated reason.
  • High level of stress or anxiety: If the child has an increased anxiety level, they will always appear very nervous and restless during any event. This also implies they have a lot of stress about something when the mind is majorly worried. In case he is behaving this way constantly, along with the increasing level of anxiety or stress in his life, it means that your child is under much pressure.
  • Socialization avoidance: In case children feel any stress or pressure about their mind so they would avoid interacting or speaking with some other people. Avoiding people or excluding people from socializing with other people can also be a sign of depression. Ensure if he or she is not passing any stress or pressure.

2) Behavioral changes

  • Behavioral changes like acting up in normal situations, behaving stubborn at times, feeling irritable or crying for no reason indicate that the child is under pressure or stress.
  • Changes in eating habits. A low or very high appetite.
  • Oversleeping or lacking the sleep
  • A sudden fall in the academic graph indicates that your child is emotionally disturbed. 

3) Physical signs

Some of the physical symptoms of stress or pressure in children are as follows:

  • Nervous habits like nail biting, hair twirling, and lip biting.
  • Very frequent headaches
  • Stomach pain, often
  • Nightmares
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Very low appetite
  • Fatigue, unexplained, etc.

Factors causing stress in children and solutions to it 

1) Academic pressure: 

Academic pressure includes school assignments, tests, exams, sports along with the extracurricular activities which leave them tired.

Academics are what take most of a child’s time; that is why it is significant in child life. Children carry the academic burden through the great expectation pinned on them to do well in their schools and earn good grades. It leads to increasing mental stress in kids.

Parents should try to lower their expectations slightly. Encourage them with statements full of motivations like “Try your best and leave the rest.” If your child got low marks or grades, make them comfortable by saying, “Don’t stress out too much; it is okay; you will perform well next time, and I am sure about it.”

2) Social life problems 

Social problems entail an inability to interact with people, to make friends, or to sustain friendship, bullying in school, and not escaping unhappiness or conflict with friends or family members. All this can seriously hamper the mental health of the children and make them feel under confident and depressed. In this case, parents need to find time for their children and have a deep conversation. Parents ask them about problems and try to find solutions for them. Motivate them “You are far stronger than you seem. I am sure you will fight through your obstacles and move forward.”

3) Family issues 

  • A stressful environment at home, frequent fights, domestic violence, parents’s divorces and bereavement  built stress in children’s minds.
  • Sometimes not loving your child and not giving them time and value can make them distressed.
  • Parents should not quarrel in front of children at home. Help them to gain emotional stability and support.

4) Peer pressure

Peer pressure is when others influence the children to act in a certain way. This may sometimes pressurise children to do unwanted things. Parents should make the child aware, especially teens of it by frankly talking about social pressures.

5) Lifestyle changes

It involves changes or alterations in a child’s daily habits, behavior, routines, or physical or emotional state. Changes, even for the better, like relocation, change of neighborhood, school or city, lead to lifestyle changes. It can also involve the addition of new family members, a new sibling, or stepparents. In this regard, parents should prepare their children in advance. All these things should be told in such a way that they have made a positive impact in their mind rather than taking the things negatively. If children are mature enough, older than 14 years parents should try to make decisions by asking for their opinions or discussing the way out with them.

6) Technology overuse 

The overuse of anything gets countered by a negative impact. Technology has a lot of positive use for human beings, but its excess use can lead to stress and also can damage the mental health of children. So it’s always better to make a boundary or limit the screen time of children. Children get easily addicted to technology. Parents should encourage them to play on playgrounds rather than video games. 

7) Lack of sleep

Improper rest may exert negative effects on the physical and mental health of a child. It generates pressure and stress in children. Parents must take care that their child is taking enough rest to keep themselves energetic.

Tips for creating stress-free and supportive environment for children

A research survey conducted by the US Department of Health and Services shows that the stress levels of children have increased in recent days. There are ways referred to by the reference research that can heal or reduce your stress level and comfort your children: 

  • Promote healthy habits: 

Inculcate healthy habits in children, in terms of going to bed early and getting up early. They should exercise at least for one hour.

  • Encourage the fun in them:

Try and spend  time with your children and do all the frolicsome things with the children—in terms of singing and dancing with them or doing painting or going on tours along with the children. Get them to their hobbies, such as playing the piano or guitar or playing sports—basketball, football, etc.

  • Good communication: 

You need to have a deep and beautiful conversation with your children in order to learn what is going on in their lives. In this way, you get to supervise their lives, guide them, and offer right advice on each point being discussed. You come to know the stress or pressure they are bearing. Try to comfort them. You can make them feel, through conversation, that you care for them and they are very important to you.

  • Give them emotional support:

It is, in fact, very important to make sure that your child is not going through any kind of mental breakouts. In this case, try to give them some emotional support.  The best way to express this is by hugging your child tightly. You can say, “I know what you are going through. It is but natural; everyone comes through such tough situations in life, and so shall you.”. Everything will be fine; so have patience. I am always there supporting you.”

  • Encourage positive thinking:

Parents should promote positive thinking in their children. It can help to boost their level of self-confidence and can promote proper mental health. You may share great positive moral stories that are going to help them keep their mind within the positive thinking sphere. You can encourage them by telling them positive things like: 

  1. Come on; you can do it.
  2. You will surely win.
  3. Only you are the best.

4) You certainly win in the game

5) God is there with you

6) You are more potent than what you assume

  • Relaxation techniques: 

The relaxation methods like medication, massage, etc. release the stress and pressure of the children.

Children become stressed often due to several pressures. Children cannot, at times, express their feelings, and that is when a mother has to closely observe them and realize if she can help the child relieve pressure for healthy psychological behavior. The ill effects of stress might affect the mood, cause anxiety, and result in frequent headaches besides sleep disturbances. Pressure may stem from academics, social problems, peer influence, and changes in lifestyle. Parents need to have frank discussions and must make efforts not to add too much pressure but be gentle and kind. A conducive environment should also be established for the child’s mental well-being at Delhi Public School Warangal, building wholesome communication and emotional strength.