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How to help pre-teens with school reopening anxiety?

Group of pre-teen students in school uniform holding a “Back to School” frame, smiling on their first day, addressing school reopening anxiety.

Teenage students, particularly those attending a new school for the first time, feel a mixture of excitement and anxiety as the new school year draws near. It’s natural for children to experience these emotions when adapting to a new environment, meeting new teachers, and forming friendships. Helping your child deal with these emotions and begin the school year with confidence is a major responsibility as parents.

It can be draining if your child is experiencing anxiety about going to school and is not willing to show up. As parents try to balance their child’s emotions with the need to get them to school and continue with your other obligations, like work, mornings can become extremely stressful. However, when your child finally makes it to the school gate, you can’t help but wonder how tough the day will be for them. Or, how stressful it is going to be to send them to school tomorrow again. We at DPS Warangal, have curated the best DPS Warangal parent portal for effective communication with the faculty for swift solutions during such times.

What makes pre-teens anxious about school and their symptoms?

For students, anxiety is characterized by feelings of fear, nervousness, or extreme concern about upcoming events, such as returning to school after a long absence. This feeling is brought on by pressure to perform well academically, to maintain social relationships, or to get used to a new routine upon returning to school. 

As kids grow into pre-teens, they start feeling anxious about school because of changes in their body, how they look, or how they compare themselves to others. If they had a hard time with a teacher or classmates last year, they worry that the new school year will be tough. These stresses show up as stomachaches, headaches, trouble sleeping, or not wanting to go to school.

Younger pupils feel uneasy about being separated from their parents and other caregivers, particularly the comfort of home. The pressure on older children to perform well in school or to live up to the expectations of their parents and teachers can be stressful. These insecurities worsen as they try to strive for excellence.

Anxiety induces a lot of signs that are both physical and emotional in nature. Other than emotional symptoms like clinginess, irritability, and a reluctance to attend school, school anxiety can also present as physical symptoms. Early identification of these symptoms and the supply of the required help are extremely important. The following are warning signs that a child’s anxiety is seriously distressing them:

  • Tantrums when going to school away from parents or other caregivers
  • Having trouble getting along with friends or family
  • Avoiding routine activities both inside and outside of the classroom
  • Symptoms like fatigue, stomachaches, and trouble falling asleep alone

How parents can support their pre-teens at home 

For all the young teenagers, summer is a time of fun and escape from the never-ending world. Until it does. It can be depressing and overwhelming to resume early mornings, homework, and extracurricular activities after school. Children may even experience the stages of grief during this transition. As parents, you can do the following to help them feel at ease about their school reopening anxiety.

  1. Listening and validating school worries.

Speaking with your child about their school worries is a good starting point. This will give your child a place to express their feelings and help you figure out their concerns. Try to listen to them and avoid unintentionally deducing their emotions. Sympathize with them that you understand how stressful the beginning of a new school year can be. Parent’s affirming behavior will help them manage stress and remind them that you are always there for support.

  1. Helping kids understand their anxiety cycle.

Begin by explaining to the child that their negative thoughts are not their reality. Educate your older child about the three interrelated components of anxiety. This includes their nervous thoughts, in this case, regarding school. The physical symptoms that accompany it like a racing heartbeat or nausea. Finally, the actions they take afterward to avoid circumstances that cause them to feel this way. It is seen that kids continue to experience anxiety when they keep avoiding triggers that make them feel this way. When kids understand the mechanism of anxiety, they might feel motivated to break the cycle from ground and show up to school.

  1. Easing into school routines early.

Start preparing kids for the upcoming shift a week or two before school starts by resuming school-year routines. Like preparing the next day’s wear and deciding on a reasonable bedtime. Restore regular wake-up times a few weeks before classes. Children can feel safer and ready for the school day if they follow a regular daily routine that includes time for homework, meals, play, and relaxation. A practice with the familiar routine can help them feel at ease.

  1. Familiarizing with the school environment.

Before the school year starts, stop by the school with your child. Practice the drop-off, and spend some time on the playground. If the building is open, go inside the classroom. While you wait outside or down the hall, have your child practice walking into class. Try to get your child to see their new classroom or even meet their new teacher.

  1. Building friendships before school starts.

Plan social events and playdates with classmates over the summer. Your child may feel more at ease when they start school again if they have stronger friendships. After all, company is what makes the school experience feel worthwhile. To add, research too supports the idea that having familiar faces at school can help children adjust to the school environment and even boost their academic achievement.

  1. Using rewards to motivate children for school.

In multiple areas of parenting and child psychology, reward systems are handy. Children show more enthusiasm if a motivating incentive is offered. You should relate it to a goal they are working towards. Mutually decide on a prize before the teen leaves for school. Give them this award the moment they return to make them feel ecstatic. Although don’t be worried about giving them a prize daily for the remaining school year. Since in no time, going to school will become a natural habit, and you can use fewer rewards.

  1. Sharing experiences to help your ward flourish.

Try to relate your school experiences of childhood to your kids now. We also faced difficulties with friendship, exams, bullying, and other things. Young teenagers are sensitive to the subconscious demands, anxieties, and expectations that we parents carry over from our upbringings. We pass these on without realizing it. Take some time to think back on your own experiences to understand what you can do differently for your kids. Remember that children need to make their own experiences and grow from their errors. If a child is constantly protected from negative experiences, they may not learn coping mechanisms to deal with life’s obstacles.

Signs to seek help from professionals 

Your child may need to be evaluated by a psychologist or psychiatrist if, after the first month or so, their symptoms worsen. Or, if they still exhibit distress related to school that does not go away. Low grades, frequent physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches, noticeable behavioral or emotional changes, sadness, or a persistent refusal to attend school can all be signs that it’s time to get help.

Children and parents can better understand their child’s symptoms and collaborate to find solutions by speaking with a mental health professional. While some kids benefit greatly from parental support, others might require more specialized assistance from qualified professionals. You can ask a professional child psychologist or your general practitioner for assistance. Here, at DPS Warangal, one of the top boarding schools of India, we have the best counselors to help our students sail through their problems.